Types of Abuse

Love and Security and the Reason for Wrong Relationships

Genesis 24:67And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.Genesis verse 67 reveals that Isaac was NOT comforted after the death of his mother until he married his wife, Rebecca. His heart ached for the love of his mother and grief filled his soul. You need to talk to God about the pain in order for God to heal you on the inside. You must ask God to help you confront the pain. God will NOT intrude where He is not wanted. You must ask Him to help you, talk about it with others, and deal with it so that you can move on with your life in a healthy way.

Man's attempt to satisfy his need for security apart from God also produces its share of trouble. When the basic need of security is unmet, fear can become a major problem, creating the potential for control and manipulation, aggressiveness, or compliance.

Confusion is another byproduct of insecurity. Sometimes, man draws security from money and investments or sometimes by relationships. This situation can yield co-dependency or produce serious abandonment issues. It is easy to become dependent on anything or anyone that provides security. Security, like love, is a very important need, motivating people in their jobs and relationships. However, the need for security, like the need for love, can produce a host of problem issues in an individual's life, if this need is satisfied apart from God.

This need to feel significant is still within man and, if unmet, produces many problems such as poor self-esteem and distorted self-image. Children who suffer rejection may spend their lives attempting to feel important, or perhaps they become like the prostitute who masochistically subjects herself to endless degradation, which reinforces the image of worthlessness resident in her soul.

Mankind desperately needs to feel important and special. A gang member who gunned down four people said "I wanted to be somebody." These children, apart from God, may spend the rest of their lives attempting to alleviate those feelings. They may become performance-driven workaholics or insecure, fearful failures. Significance is an emotional and mental need with which each person is born and will spend his life attempting to meet.

So, the need for love, security, and significance are man's major goals. One tends to revere and honor whatever satisfies his needs, deeming it precious to his heart and life. If God is NOT the source of these needs, this highly favored assignment goes to another. This circumstance positions God in COMPETITION. The result is idolatry which jeopardizes ALL AREAS of one's life. A person is OUT OF ORDER when he satisfies his needs selfishly and apart from God. This very serious aberration of God's plan produces an assortment of relationship abuses.