Page updated 22 Dec 2015

Types of Abuse

The 'Narcissistic' Personality


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Also, narcissists are usually physically attractive and charming at first glance, so they may have advantages when they first meet people (making a sale, getting a first date, gaining popularity). However, the long-term outcomes for narcissists are usually quite dismal, especially socially (e.g., long-term relationship difficulties). On average, levels of narcissism drop quite dramatically by age 30.

More Symptoms

Source: Mayo Clinic | www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20025568

Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by dramatic, emotional behavior, which is in the same category as antisocial and borderline personality disorders.

Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

Believing that you're better than others
Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
Exaggerating your achievements or talents
Expecting constant praise and admiration
Believing that you're special and acting accordingly
Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings
Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
Taking advantage of others
Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
Being jealous of others
Believing that others are jealous of you
Trouble keeping healthy relationships
Setting unrealistic goals
Being easily hurt and rejected
Having a fragile self-esteem
Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional

Although some features of narcissistic personality disorder may seem like having confidence or strong self-esteem, it's not the same. Narcissistic personality disorder crosses the border of healthy confidence and self-esteem into thinking so highly of yourself that you put yourself on a pedestal. In contrast, people who have healthy confidence and self-esteem don't value themselves more than they value others.

When you have narcissistic personality disorder, you may come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious. You often monopolize conversations. You may belittle or look down on people you perceive as inferior. You may have a sense of entitlement And when you don't receive the special treatment to which you feel entitled, you may become very impatient or angry. You may insist on having "the best" of everything — the best car, athletic club, medical care or social circles, for instance.

But underneath all this behavior often lies a fragile self-esteem. You have trouble handling anything that may be perceived as criticism. You may have a sense of secret shame and humiliation. And in order to make yourself feel better, you may react with rage or contempt and efforts to belittle the other person to make yourself appear better.

Causes

It's not known what causes narcissistic personality disorder. As with other mental disorders, the cause is likely complex. The cause may be linked to a dysfunctional childhood, such as excessive pampering, extremely high expectations, abuse or neglect. It's also possible that genetics or psychobiology — the connection between the brain and behavior and thinking — plays a role in the development of narcissistic personality disorder.

Risk Factors

Narcissistic personality disorder is rare. It affects more men than women. Narcissistic personality disorder often begins in early adulthood. Although some adolescents may seem to have traits of narcissism, this may simply be typical of the age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.

Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, some researchers think that extreme parenting behaviors, such as neglect or excessive indulgent praise, may be partially responsible.

Risk factors for narcissistic personality disorder may include:

Parental disdain for fears and needs expressed during childhood
Lack of affection and praise during childhood
Neglect and emotional abuse in childhood
Excessive praise and over-indulgence
Unpredictable or unreliable caregiving from parents
Learning manipulative behaviors from parents

Children who learn from their parents that vulnerability is unacceptable may lose their ability to empathize with others' needs. They may also mask their emotional needs with grandiose, egotistical behavior that's calculated to make them seem emotionally "bulletproof."

Complications

Complications of narcissistic personality disorder, if left untreated, can include:

Substance abuse
Alcohol abuse
Depression
Suicidal thoughts or behavior
Relationship difficulties
Problems at work or school

More Signs of Narcissism

Writer: Diana Rasmussen | www.prayersandpromises.org/here-is-your-sign-no-narcissists-allowed/

(1) It’s all about them. You don’t exist – except to listen to them brag about how important they are. They have very over-inflated egos. They are arrogant and prideful. Yes, they really do believe their ---- does not stink!

(2) Your feelings really don’t matter to them. You could talk until you are blue in the face and they still would not understand. And most of the time they really don’t care anyway.

(3) They refuse to take responsibility for anything – ever. Even if they are caught red-handed. It is always somebody else’s fault for everything bad that happens to them.

(4) They LIE – a lot. They really have no sense of what is true and what is false. And their lies get bigger and more grandiose every time they tell the same story.

(5) They really do believe that they are superior and better than you. That’s why they take every opportunity to point out all of your flaws. They will cut you down and humiliate you in public just to make themselves feel better. Abusers are usually narcissistic.

(6) They really are two-faced. In the beginning they are charming, and flattering. They entice you into their web of lies. And most people who don’t know them fall for it too. But behind closed doors the ‘snake’ comes out.

(7) They are vindictive. They never forget who hurt them and will not miss an opportunity to retaliate. It might even be years later, yet they still hang onto anger and absolutely refuse to forgive anyone for anything. If you make them look bad ever, you will get clobbered.

(8) They are masters at turning the tables. They will take something they are doing, and accuse you of the same thing. For example, my ex was lying, so he accused me of lying. They will be having an affair, and then turn around and accuse you of having an affair. When they do something it is ok, but if you do it – you are wrong and stupid, and get humiliated.


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